080817

The past months have been very hard for me in almost every aspect of my life. I got too frustrated a lot and oftentimes it manifested in my works, words and actions. And most of the time, I wanted to give up. Spiritually, I knew there was something wrong with me. There were a lot of times I forgot to pray or devote time to talk to God or even read the Bible. Sometimes, when I read the Bible, it seemed like nothing is sticking up in my head. I know there is something wrong with my heart.


However, last weekend, it seems I am having a renewed sense of spirituality. I began my Saturday with reading the Bible, praying and devoting a time to talk to God. And it was really refreshing.  It is as if all the battles I’ve been fighting for almost 7 months have vanished.


“Do not lose heart,” God said. And it stuck in my head.
“Do not lose heart,” God said and I trust Him.
“Do not lose heart,” God said and my heart steadied.

 

Yes, Lord, I will not lose heart


Yien080817

20170806_141256-01

Advertisements

Note to My Younger Self | 12 | 25

“Sing to me the song of the stars
of Your galaxy dancing and laughing
and laughing again
When it feels like my dreams are so far
Sing to me of the plans that You have for me over again”

25 has brought you here, in this moment, the moment of true surrender, the moment of letting the voice inside your head be heard, the moment of finally letting go of control, and finally taking your own advice.

You are meant to live for so much more. Don’t lose yourself finding out life, finding out if dreams truly do come true. Don’t lose yourself in looking for tangible things. Don’t lose your footing on the ground because the ground will take you to many places if you just remain grounded.

You are meant to live for so much more. The world will offer you many things, many temporary highs. But remember, what you are called for. Remember the very purpose of your existence.

You are meant to live for so much more. So don’t let your predetermined plans get in God’s way. Don’t let your futile attempt to be more, slip you away from your true calling.

You are meant to live for so much more. You are meant to love.

You are meant to live for so much more. So much more that you shall not settle for anything less of what you deserve. Don’t settle to things that make your heart ache. Don’t settle to people who make you feel little. Don’t settle to the life this world got to offer. Because I tell you, this world does not compare to anything God has in store for you.

Lastly, Julienne, you are meant to live for so much more. Don’t let control control you. Don’t let your grip suffocate you. Don’t let yourself hold you back.


This is the last from the Sunday Series, Note to My Younger Self.  To read the previous posts, click the following:

Note to My Younger Self | 01 | 2007 (Best Shot)

Note to My Younger Self | 02 | 2008 (Goodbyes)

Note to My Younger Self | 03 | 2009 (Everything’s Okay)

Note to My Younger Self | 04 | 2010 (Hard Times)

Note to My Younger Self | 05 | 2011 (Learning to Breathe)

Note to My Younger Self | 06 | 2012 (Endings & Beginnings)

Note to My Younger Self | 07 | 2013 (More)

Note to My Younger Self | 08 | 2014 (Slow Down)

Note to My Younger Self | 09 | 2015 (Set Apart)

Note to My Younger Self | 10 | 2016 (Defying Gravity)

Note to My Younger Self | 11 | 2017 (Lesson Learned)

Note to My Younger Self is a 12-week Sunday Series that aims to make sense of my past in order for me to move on to the present without extra baggage.



Photo Credit: Staring at the Sky

Note to My Younger Self | 09 | 2015

“There are certain times in this life that you find yourself pursuing a course that you are not certain will prove to be fruitful. Then, all of a sudden, out of nowhere, miraculously you receive the smallest sign or indication that you’re on the right track.”

A year of excellence, you said. A year when you would be excellent in every aspect of  your life for the sole purpose of setting an example to nonbelievers, you said. Has this been the case?

Looking back to 2015, you started the year with high hopes, believing in the impossible, holding on to His promises. However, as months passed by, the typical-you were slipping away. Raised as a realist-pessimist, you were confronted by the fact that not everything as planned could go along your way. And that drifted you.

But then, the typical-you would only see the negative circumstances that gone your way, you wouldn’t realized immediately, the blessings God had showered you. He had given you opportunities to give, to share, to encourage and to go outside your comfort zone.

You thought you fell short on being excellent. But to tell you the truth, I am amazed of how far you’ve come as a person. What you did then, made you a better person now. Your heart grew and glowed.  It grew to a more emphatic and thoughtful heart. It glowed and it shows.

Younger self, I will tell you again, don’t be too hard on yourself. You are doing what you can to make the world a better one. Yes, life is a series of pulls back and forth but it doesn’t mean you need to be swallowed by your pessimistic view of the world and self.

Younger self, I am happy that your heart grows and you learn to accept the inevitable part of life, that even though you know this, you still chooses to see the beauty amidst the ugliness.

Younger self, continue to give, to share, to encourage and to go outside your comfort zone. You are excellent on those things, remember that.


To read Sunday Series, Note to My Younger Self, click the following:

Note to My Younger Self | 01 | 2007 (Best Shot)

Note to My Younger Self | 02 | 2008 (Goodbyes)

Note to My Younger Self | 03 | 2009 (Everything’s Okay)

Note to My Younger Self | 04 | 2010 (Hard Times)

Note to My Younger Self | 05 | 2011 (Learning to Breathe)

Note to My Younger Self | 06 | 2012 (Endings & Beginnings)

Note to My Younger Self | 07 | 2013 (More)

Note to My Younger Self | 08 | 2014 (Slow Down)

Note to My Younger Self is a 12-week Sunday Series that aims to make sense of my past in order for me to move on to the present without extra baggage.



Quote from the book: The Ultimate Gift by Jim Stovall

Photo: OddyseyOnline

 

Gratefulness

To realize God can bring joy to the most unexpected moment is to realize how great He is, how great His love is, how great His mercy is.

You never fail to surprise me, Lord! You never fail to show Your greatness! You never fail to give joy. You are the ultimate joy-bringer, hope-bringer and rest-bringer.

Thank you, Lord!


Yien06.28.17

P.S. I can’t contain the joy I am feeling right now. I can’t really put it to right word.


Hey Grace!

“If grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking…” Today, I was reminded by you. Oh, grace, in every unexpected moments of my life, you’ve been there. In every boring parts of my existence, you’ve been there. And to tell you truthfully, I can’t see myself without you. There were times, when I forget how you […]

The Label You Put Inside Your Head

20

Let me tell you this: you are NOT the label you put inside your head, neither, the label others tell you behind your back. 

People tend to box us of their slight idea about us. People try to grasp us in a way they see our lives, based on their biases, based on their stereotypes. But the truth is, what they can only access is the tip of our icebergs. They can only see what their minds can understand. They perceive what they want to perceive. And that my friend is not dangerous at all. It is part of life. People judge us and form stereotypes about us. The danger is, what our own minds can create and make us believe.

Our own minds are dangerous. Maybe too dangerous. What we put in our minds define our being.

Let me ask you, who are you? What defines you? Me, for example, is a self-proclaimed introvert. I know there is no danger about being an introvert. But you know what’s terrifying about my idea of myself? It is that, most of the time, I am too absorbed in being an introvert, which defeat the very purpose of my existence here on earth, to share and to love.

The thing about knowing yourself too much and labeling yourself is that you feel you are ought to be just that kind of person, when in fact, you are not called to be just that person, you are called for more: to step out of your idea of yourself and be out there.

The point I am trying to say is: Maybe the label we put in our heads is not the label we are cut out for. Maybe we are meant to live for so much more than our ideas and stereotypes. Maybe, just maybe, life would be better if we stop labeling ourselves and start lighting up the very purpose we are here on earth.

Right now, what I am certain of is, we are not the label we put inside our heads, neither, the label others tell us behind our backs… We are in fact God’s, and His idea about us is what matters.


Yien03.26.17

Photo by: jacobsmedia.com

Hawak

unspoken

Pagod na pagod na akong lumaban.

Pagod na pagod na akong hawakan, ang mga pangarap na tila ba’y wala namang patutunguhan.

Pagod na akong tahakin ang landas na hindi ko alam ang pupuntahan.

Ligtas pa ba kung sasabihin kong, ayoko na, tigil na?

Sa ganitong panahon, napapagtanto ko kung gaano kahirap na kapitan ang mga bagay na mawawala rin pala.

Sa ganitong panahon, nararamdaman ko na hindi ko pala kayang mag-isa.

Dahil sa ganitong panahon, na akala ko’y kaya ko ng bumitaw, ‘yon pala’y hawak Mo pa rin ang aking mga kamay.

Ang aking mga kamay, nanginginig, napapagod.

Napapagod na sa pagsusulat ng mga bagay, mga plano… na sa huli pala ay parang bulang mawawala.

Nanginginig sa takot kung tama pa ba ito, nanginginig sa pagod, sa paglaban, sa pagpapatuloy ng mga bagay na hindi pala para sa’kin.

Ito na ang katapusan,

Tatapusin ko na.

Ang paglaban sa isang digmaan na pinanalunan Mo na.

Ito na ang katapusan,

Tatapusin ko na.

At ngayon ikaw naman uli ang mag-uumpisa.

Umpisahan Mong baguhin ang puso ko, buuin, pagtibayin, palambutin.

Umpisahan Mong gawin ang nararapat.

Tapos na ako.

Ikaw na uli ang may hawak sa buhay ko.

02.18.17

Book of the Month: Found by Isa Garcia

“This is a story about love, adventure and friendship with a heroine who dares to disturb the universe because she can rest in the certainty that she will always be… FOUND” – Found, Isa Garcia

Before I start, I wanted to tell all of you that this month I am fully fulfilled as a book nerd.  I did not expect to read 5 books on January. One Yey for me.

With these five books, I can’t choose which book will be the Book of the Month. There you have Regret No More by Nelson Dy in which I  learned so much from it; Skulduggery Pleasant The Faceless Ones by Derek Landy which I did not expect it will be good and of course the cliffhanger; Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell, my first YA of the year, which is unexpectedly good also; Of Mice and Men by John Steinback which is as usual can rip my heart into a million pieces, and; Found by Isa Garcia.

But because Found is too beautiful both its aesthetics and context, I will choose it as January’s Book of the Month.

Have you ever felt that seemingly in this world full of people, no one can get you? No one can feel you? I, sometimes, feel that way. I thought no one is feeling and thinking the way I do. I thought I am alone in this. But then, there is this book that speaks whatever my mouth cannot utter, my mind cannot put into precise context and that’s Found by Isa Garcia. And I am grateful to read this.

Found is a collection of letters on love, life and God. I love the letters inside plus the postcards.

So, as a whole, Found is an easy read and inspiring book. If you are a girl who is lost or who finds it hard to get along with life… this book is for you.