Sunday Currently | 04

Sunday Currently(1)

Hello there! It’s been two weeks since the last time I wrote a Sunday Currently feature. For those of you asking (are there?), I deliberately did not post a Sunday Currently because of life. There has been changes which my mind should further ponder. But I will tell you about that some other time (or not).

Unspoken(4)

Reading

Magnus Chase and The Sword of Summer by Rick Riordan. Well, I love mythology.

Writing

a Sunday Currently feature, obviously. Oh, and I should be writing for my guest blog post right now. But, no, I haven’t started yet because….PROCRASTINATION!

Listening

What’s Up Ahead by Yeng Constantino and her husband Yan Asuncion. I haven’t heard it for awhile.

Just so you know, my SD card was corrupted last week, so all of my music was also corrupted. That’s why last week was very stressful for me. Music is life!

Watching

Nothing. But I just finished watching Netflix’s 13 Reasons Why. I have read the book 3-4 years ago and I can’t vividly remember the details of the book. But man, the series was too dark, too vivid, and too real. There were no pretensions, no sugarcoating, no romanticizing of suicide. It depicted what this world is trying to hide: sexual harassment, bullying, slut-shaming, rape, victim-blaming, and suicide. I don’t know what have I just watched. It’s just insanely good and ugly at the same time. Oh don’t get me wrong with the word ugly, what am I trying to say is the series was too real that it concretely depicted the ugliness of the world we live in.

Thinking

of 13 Reasons Why, life, death, frustrations, words, being kind, earthquake, arts, relationships, how could I spend 1,000.00 pesos for 3 books, travel itinerary, my phone always hanging, my blog, the guest blog post I should have been writing right now, holy week… I mean, I think a lot.

  • Life & Death

I’ve already talked about this from my previous posts. But until now, life and death seem too mysterious for me. I know, life is ephemeral and such. Death is the end of all of us. What you do in between them is what matters most. But how could we accept certain facts like death? We live, we die, and now what?

  • Frustrations

In between life and death is a lot of frustrations. I know I can handle it. But how about the others, can they?

  • Words and Being Kind

Words left unsaid even you mean well or you are just too afraid to voice it out, unkind words uttered even as a joke… they all can make or break a person. Everything is a ripple effect. What if that certain word you are not voicing out, is the only word a person need to go on with life? What if?

  • Earthquake

Yesterday, I have felt 5 earthquakes and that was terrifying. So now, I am thinking, what was going on?

  • Relationships

I am thinking how on earth I am trying hard to be relatable but end up not being one. Maybe I’m like Clay (reference: 13 Reasons Why), coward and clueless. It’s just so hard being of this world. But don’t get me wrong again, I am just wondering why am I not relatable enough.

Smelling

a bookstore smell. I realized my room smells like a library/bookstore and I love it.

Wishing

for the safety of everyone. Really I am boggled by the frequent earthquake.

Wearing

the usual pambahay, white shirt (a souvenir from Baguio) and black shorts.

Hoping

for answers to questions.

Loving

the fact that I am alone and I can hear Ed Sheeran’s voice while writing this particular sentence.

Needing

a sleep. Yes, I’ve been sleeping a lot lately but also I’ve been getting up too early than my usual waking hours. It’s been two weeks since the last time I completed an 8-hour sleep. I don’t know what’s up but I think there is something wrong but I cannot point it out.

Feeling

everything at once and for the first time, I am glad that I am feeling a certain kind of emotion. Because this only means that I am alive. Well, I am very overwhelmed of what I just have watched, you know, the topic of depression and suicide are overwhelming enough which I am glad I am not experiencing even though life is hard most of the time.


So… this entry is kind of depressing but I suppose I am really hit by Netflix’s 13 Reasons Why.


Here’s a quote I remembered from the book The Unicorn Road while watching TRW:

“But your little words do just that, don’t they, Venn? They order the acts that set in course events that can never then be undone. They make it all happen. And people die in agony because they will not say the little words required of them. Or they die because they say the wrong words, or just because they’ve never been taught the words that will save them. The power of kings is nothing to the power of those words you deal in.”

“When words are your daily currency, it can be easy to forget their power.”

The Unicorn Road, Martin Davies

Lost

 

unspokenHave you ever feel lost?

Like a fool looking for answers,

Looking for something to hold on to,

Looking for signs, little hope to go on.

Ten thousand days, ten thousand weeks,

Ten thousand months, ten thousand years.

Yet the ears are fixed to the only familiar sound,

The sound of the only thing that is keeping me alive.

Wondering, wandering…

Feeling, seeing…

Believing, trusting…

Should I still go on?

Or is this the right time to let go?


Yien 040317

  • Hugot sa na-corrupt na SD card.

The Label You Put Inside Your Head

20

Let me tell you this: you are NOT the label you put inside your head, neither, the label others tell you behind your back. 

People tend to box us of their slight idea about us. People try to grasp us in a way they see our lives, based on their biases, based on their stereotypes. But the truth is, what they can only access is the tip of our icebergs. They can only see what their minds can understand. They perceive what they want to perceive. And that my friend is not dangerous at all. It is part of life. People judge us and form stereotypes about us. The danger is, what our own minds can create and make us believe.

Our own minds are dangerous. Maybe too dangerous. What we put in our minds define our being.

Let me ask you, who are you? What defines you? Me, for example, is a self-proclaimed introvert. I know there is no danger about being an introvert. But you know what’s terrifying about my idea of myself? It is that, most of the time, I am too absorbed in being an introvert, which defeat the very purpose of my existence here on earth, to share and to love.

The thing about knowing yourself too much and labeling yourself is that you feel you are ought to be just that kind of person, when in fact, you are not called to be just that person, you are called for more: to step out of your idea of yourself and be out there.

The point I am trying to say is: Maybe the label we put in our heads is not the label we are cut out for. Maybe we are meant to live for so much more than our ideas and stereotypes. Maybe, just maybe, life would be better if we stop labeling ourselves and start lighting up the very purpose we are here on earth.

Right now, what I am certain of is, we are not the label we put inside our heads, neither, the label others tell us behind our backs… We are in fact God’s, and His idea about us is what matters.


Yien03.26.17

Photo by: jacobsmedia.com

Sunday Currently | 03

sund

 

I thought I would not be writing a Sunday Currently today. But yeah, I still write. I woke up early today and I feel I should write something, and the most sensible thing to write is a Sunday Currently feature.

  • I woke up with chirping birds outside.
  • I woke up singing Lorde’s new singles, Liability and Green Light.
  • I woke up determined to reread Narnia.
  • I woke up hungry.
  • I woke up blah blah blah…

 

Unspoken(3)

Reading

Chronicles of Narnia again but now I’ll be reading it in chronological order. Also, I’ve finished reading Everything, Everything by Nicola Yoon and I was very disappointed with this one. I’ve read the other book of Nicola Yoon which by the way was so good. I thought EE has the same caliber. But no, I got my expectations too high.

For Bible Reading, just finished reading John 🙂

Writing

Sunday Currently 3. I thought I will not be writing this because I want to have a weekend full of readings. However, I am now writing this.

Listening

Look at Me Now covered by Karmin. How I missed Karmin, they already disbanded last year which made me sad but realized they are still married soooo… it’s okay. But I think I will miss all those covers and the voice of Nick Noonan.

Also, I am very happy that Lorde came out with 2 new singles!!!

Oh, I almost forgot, last night I listened to The Purposeful Creative podcast and I was #fangirling to the fact that Arriane Serafico is interviewing Abbey Sy! The 2 women I look up to because of their works! Yeah, I was one happy nerd/fangirl last night!

Watching

None. I am not into watching. However, earlier, I watched itsjudylife beca…beca…because (only itsjudylife fan will get this). MK forever!!! Also, before sleeping last night, I watched a review of the Divide album of Ed Sheeran.

Honestly, I missed watching Nickelodeon and Disney shows, mindlessly laughing about corny and one-liner jokes.

Thinking

of sleeping again.

Smelling

food or am I just hallucinating or am I hungry?

Wishing

life would be easier.

Wearing

the usual pambahay, white shirt and pink shorts.

Hoping

for new books to read. However, I realized my shelf is already full of books and I have a lots of TBR pile. See, I am in a dilemma right now. I hate it when I need to rationalize with myself, like, who am I kidding?

Loving

the fact that my li’l brother is at home. I haven’t seen him for months now and I missed him so much. So, last night I bullied him (that’s how I show my love and care… haha). #bebeboy #saudiboyinthehouse

Also, loving the fact that I am rereading one of my favorite books of all time, Narnia.

Loving the fact that my sister is now reading my favorite book, The Five People You Meet in Heaven. Btw, she is not a reader, so, this is really a big deal for me. It is just so nice to know I am making an impact to one’s life.

Needing

courage and strength to start planning about the interior of my room.

Feeling

sick. I feel like I will be having a sore throat. But yeah, life goes on.

Also, feeling excited about next Friday’s out-of-town with my friend! Finally, a real vacation!


To wrap up this entry, I would like to honor the founder of the Sunday Currently feature, siddathornton.


“Stop doubting and believe”

John 20: 27

 

 

Sunday Currently | 02

Sunday Currently

 

My brain is not cooperating today, so please bear with all the nonsense you will be reading today.

Unspoken(2)

Reading

some articles in the internet. I haven’t read any book this week. But I am planning to reread Chronicles of Narnia because I missed the world of Narnia so much.

For Bible reading, still reading Exodus and John.

I don’t know why I am in a reading slump right now and it is very frustrating.

Writing

Sunday Currently and thinking of another one for Thursday schedule.

Listening

Mary, Did You Know? covered by Pentatonix and bird chirping. For the record, my playlist is in shuffle. These past few days, I’ve been listening a lot of musicals, such as Wicked, Lea Salonga’s songs and High School Musical. Also, listening to Reese Lansangan. Go Indie!

Watching

nothing! But I’ve been meaning to watch Riverdale and The Last Five Years but I’m too lazy to download. And I still have 3 movies to watch that I haven’t started watching yet. Why am I too lazy these days?

Thinking

of many things (as usual). Thinking about modern-day oppression/slavery, violins, consistency, why I dislike going out, introvertness, labels, sleeping, leaving, photoshoot, re-organizing my bookshelf/art area and other random things.

Smelling

nothing!

Wishing

not to be lazy!

Wearing

oversized sky blue t-shirt with heart print and orange shorts with floral print.

Hoping

for…. uggghhhh… my mind isn’t working now. I think my brain is still asleep. Hoping to end reading slump and to get back to journaling.

Loving

the fact that today is Sunday and I can be lazy however and whenever I like. Loving the chirping birds outside. Loving Bamboo (currently singing in the background). Loving the fact my jam is currently playing. Loving that I woke up early to write early even though my brain is still asleep.

But you know what, I love being idle right now. Last year, I’ve been hustling and running from one idea to another. My schedule was a mess. Everything is a mess even this blog. However, this year I think I will be more kind to myself.

Needing

a one week of recharging. One thing about being an introvert is that when they interact with so many people, they need to recharge. And I badly need a week-long recharging because of those necessary and unnecessary interactions (and those unplanned meetings). I am just wondering, can I tell my boss that I will be on leave because my anxiety is kicking in again? For the record, anxiety is an illness, sooooo….. (hoping that my boss will not read this entry).

Feeling

Is sleepy a feeling? If it is, that’s what I am feeling right now.

But seriously, I am boggled about the modern-day slavery I read last Tuesday and until now I am still thinking about it. The fact that it is still happening here in the Philippines makes me very anxious about the Filipino people. Because if a clan of elitist can do such things, especially to those marginally poor and innocent people, how much more an elitist cum government official? To be honest, I feel helpless about the situation of the Filipino people. Dolores Umbridge is real!!!!


To sum up, I am sleepy and my brain isn’t working and this entry is a rubbish.


To end this entry, presenting the Bible verse of the day:

14 “I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me— 15 just as the Father knows me and I know the Father—and I lay down my life for the sheep.”

-John 10:14-15 (NIV)

Words

unspoken

How loud could silence be?

How a word could mean nothing?

How action speaks louder?

But silence is more deafening?

 

In those pausing and waiting

are lost words,

words that could mean everything

but were left unsaid.

 

Between words and action

are the guessing, thinking

how cowardice takes place?

how courage seems to deplete?

 

In those thinking and guessing,

our life unfolds

a story which never started but ended,

and that’s how this will end.

 

03.05.17


This is how Ed Sheeran music affects me.

Sunday Currently | 01

201

This is my first time to do some entry tag called the Sunday Currently. So how should I start this? Uhmmm… clueless (I am forever clueless!) Should I tell you about the past week? Or should I tell you about my life? To be honest, nothing spectacular happened… sooooooooooooo….. and yes my life is rather uninteresting.

Without further ado, here it is:

unspoken1

Reading

…Just finished reading Who Would Have Thought by Acel Bisa Van Ommen, such a good book! Right now, I am still pondering what to read next.

For my Bible Reading, I am reading Exodus and John. 🙂

Writing

Obviously, I am writing my first ever Sunday Currently, while writing my Thursday entry which is a prose and poetry about words. Check it out on Thursday at exactly 12:30PM Philippine time.

Listening

to my playlist. While writing this, I am listening to Honeymoon Avenue by Ariana Grande (my playlist is in shuffle mode, okay?). But recently, I am listening to mostly Indie music, Ed Sheeran, Paramore, Switchfoot, La La Land Soundtrack and Lea Salonga. My favorite right now is…. who am I kidding, I can’t choose!

Watching

Right at this moment, nothing. But earlier, I was watching random videos in Facebook and Youtube. While writing this, I can’t remember what videos I’ve watched.

Thinking

Uhmmm…. I am thinking too many things right now. If you knew me very well, you will know that my brain never gets idle. Currently, thinking about Paramore, Ed Sheeran, what to write next, Switchfoot, the Bible, arts and many more and oh, FOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

Smelling

This is weird. I am currently smelling something is cooking! FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

Wishing

upon the star that I will not be a stubborn child of God. Defying God is really tiring and wearying.

Wearing

red sleeveless and shorts.

Hoping

to eat as soon as possible. I’m HUNGRY because it is already lunch time and I haven’t eaten breakfast yet… coz…. lettering and Ed Sheeran!

And to get back to journaling. Lately, I’ve been too sluggish to creatively write in my journal. And to also get back to writing sensible topics. Procrastination!

Loving

Ed Sheeran’s new album, Divide! He knows how to make my heart melt everytime! And the fact that in every song there is some growling. Awwwwwww….

And loving the fact that it is Sunday and I could do whatever I want (which is most likely reading, writing, lettering and sleeping).

Needing

some food!

Feeling

I don’t know how to feel right now. My heart seems to be in a roller coaster ride yesterday because of some music I am listening to and some thoughts that in the first place I shouldn’t be thinking.

Right now, my superficial feeling says I am happy since I read a book and finished it after an almost a month of reading hiatus. Also, I’ve been experimenting with my lettering. And I’ve been praying a lot lately and some prayers have been answered. So… generally I am happy.

I just remembered, I tweeted yesterday about “feeling happy,” it says:

“I think I am so accustomed with sadness that happiness seems like a foreign idea to me.”

Should I further explain it?


So how’s your Sunday? Or weekend? Is it productive? If not, no worries, sometimes we need to be still to know what is important.

See you next Sunday for the Sunday Currently feature.

 

 

The Takeaways: The War, The Surrender and Everything in Between

What if your life is crumbling down before your eyes? What if all you know is starting to look like a lie? What if being in control brings more trouble than surrendering?

Finally, I’m done reading War Room. It’s been 3 months since I’ve started opening it and tried to read. But unfortunately, haven’t read it continuously because I’m too busy reading other books.

Only this February, I picked it up again from my bookshelf and read it. And this time, with the intention of finishing. And boom… this book hits home… and it hits home hard enough to make me fall on my knees and surrender.


WAR ROOM TAKEAWAYS:

  • You cannot win a battle on your own.

let-him-do-the-fighting-you-only-need-to-trust-in-him

  • There is no sense on fighting a battle that has been already won by God.

you-cannot-change-people-only-god-can-do-that

  • Praying is not a matter of God granting a wish, but it is more of aligning your heart desires to His plan.
  • Stop taking control. Stop doing it on your own. Let Him do driving.
  • So much God can do to your life, allow Him to work with your heart.

you-cannot-change-people-only-god-can-do-that-2

  • Praying is the best battle plan to defeat the enemy.

you-cannot-change-people-only-god-can-do-that-4

  • Trust God.
  • Praying for other people is liberating.

you-cannot-change-people-only-god-can-do-that-5

to be continued…

Hawak

unspoken

Pagod na pagod na akong lumaban.

Pagod na pagod na akong hawakan, ang mga pangarap na tila ba’y wala namang patutunguhan.

Pagod na akong tahakin ang landas na hindi ko alam ang pupuntahan.

Ligtas pa ba kung sasabihin kong, ayoko na, tigil na?

Sa ganitong panahon, napapagtanto ko kung gaano kahirap na kapitan ang mga bagay na mawawala rin pala.

Sa ganitong panahon, nararamdaman ko na hindi ko pala kayang mag-isa.

Dahil sa ganitong panahon, na akala ko’y kaya ko ng bumitaw, ‘yon pala’y hawak Mo pa rin ang aking mga kamay.

Ang aking mga kamay, nanginginig, napapagod.

Napapagod na sa pagsusulat ng mga bagay, mga plano… na sa huli pala ay parang bulang mawawala.

Nanginginig sa takot kung tama pa ba ito, nanginginig sa pagod, sa paglaban, sa pagpapatuloy ng mga bagay na hindi pala para sa’kin.

Ito na ang katapusan,

Tatapusin ko na.

Ang paglaban sa isang digmaan na pinanalunan Mo na.

Ito na ang katapusan,

Tatapusin ko na.

At ngayon ikaw naman uli ang mag-uumpisa.

Umpisahan Mong baguhin ang puso ko, buuin, pagtibayin, palambutin.

Umpisahan Mong gawin ang nararapat.

Tapos na ako.

Ikaw na uli ang may hawak sa buhay ko.

02.18.17