Ok let me share to you this beautiful song which I only stumbled upon browsing facebook (please click the red colored word facebook to watch and listen to the song). I am so glad to hear this song. I think God has His way of revealing Himself to me and most of the time He does that through music.
These past few days, I’ve been really anxious that I started to doubt again everything, my life, my faith, my work, my passion, my talent, as in everything about this world. I hate that feeling and I associate this on the weather. I drowned myself with negative thoughts. I wanted to escape and be back to my safer ground which is writing and reading. But even those things I love doing seems uninteresting anymore. I thought I surpass all those anxious thoughts. But then I was wrong. Because truthfully, ANXIETY is hard to surpass. Every morning, I wake up, feeling not good enough. Every night, before I sleep feels like a happy space because at least even in my 9 hours of sleep I can escape that dreading feeling.
So hearing this song leave me teary-eyed. And I even doubt my own doubts and questioned myself, why am I doubting life again? Why am I doubting God? Why am I thinking sad thoughts? Why am I embracing sadness? Why am I even thinking that I do not belong in this world? When in fact, I belong to God and God alone. Why am I starting to be this fearful girl again? When in fact, God told me to be courageous and He will be there for me wherever I go. Why am I self-pitying? When in fact He told me that I am the apple of His eye.
Yes, I am still anxious, sad and even doubtful. But what I know is this: God loves me and died for me. And I think that is more than enough to keep on going, to keep on dreaming, to keep on pursuing excellence, to keep on blessing other people and to keep on being this woman God wants me to be.
Yes, these are my thoughts. I am not expressive and not even a drama queen. And I do not know why am I publicly posting this where everyone I know can see it. But who knows, someone might be feeling the same way as I am. Remember: “Tomorrow is Another Day.” Another day to truly live a life which counts.
I pray that God will bless every aspect of your life. God bless us all.