For most of my existence, I have been distrustful to people. I don’t fully trust anyone in my life, even family members or any close friends.
I HAVE TRUST ISSUE…
I still can’t figure out how my trust issue started, just one day, I realized, I don’t trust anything in this world.
Whenever I am alone and when not reading a book, I always imagine things like performing in front of the crowd, being a best-seller author and sharing knowledge to other people.
There are times when I thought of myself having split personality. And totally just doubt my existence or questioning if I really know myself or if what I know is what others see to me. I know there are totally crazy thoughts. But what if? I am also questioning why red is called red and not white?
What if we are just conditioned to believe everything? Even the belief that God exist.
Trust and faith go hand in hand. If you don’t trust, you don’t have faith.
These little thoughts come to my mind:
When we distrust, we make God so small.
When we doubt, we make God so sad.
I know, I’m still battling my issues on trust. In Christian life, it is hard to be always in doubt. But this year, I claim to challenge and stretch my faith. This needs a lot of trusting, right?
If you are like me who’s battling on being distrustful, let us contemplate day and night the below verses and I hope we’ll win our battle:
Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.
By the way, this is my reflection on the fifth devotional of Refuel by Ru dela Torre, entitled, Yellow Sign.